Friday, January 7, 2011

Day 4 - Why Will It Be Different This Time?

Will I be changed forever by the changes I make this year? That is my desire.

I need to be conscious every step of the way.  Making conscious choices of where I'm going and what I'm doing, and not letting emotions carry me off the healthy eating and lifestyle path.

Emotions to beware of: Guilt (feelings of 'should'); Pessimism ('Whatever; it doesn't make any difference' kinds of thoughts); Unique or Special ('just for this once, or this little while' -- an extremely dangerous thought for me to have -- overindulgence in spending has already happened... cannot let that transfer over to food).

I'm sure there are more, but that is what is on my mind as I start today: How Will This Time Be Different (so that I become an exception to a rule, rather than a statistic in keeping weight off once it is lost).
* * *
2:21 pm

Hmmmmmm... the food isn't tasting as 'tasty' today... the Cappuccino I had last night was fine. This morning I mixed it with coffee and water and didn't do very well mixing it up -- there was much sludge at the bottom of the mug -- and that was my breakfast :-(

The PB Crunch bar was fine -- I was pretty hungry so I scarfed it in 10 minutes (I usually make it last an hour)... and I just had Chili -- which I soaked in hot water last night -- heated it again this morning for more absorption to take place, and it was spicy soy curds.  I added extra water to bulk it up, and I did that last time, but not until I'd put the called-for amount of water in and soaked/cooked it... and I ate it within a few minutes, maybe letting it sit around too long made it rubbery.

I'm hungry today.  Day 4 and I'm supposed to be over this part of it, right?! A friend asked if I was hungry... and I hadn't been really, until today (!)

I think to change that "Are You Hungry?" question around to, "Are You Stuffed?" might be an interesting and productive exercise... because I DO have a lot more energy... and I know that is because I'm not over-eating. I'm still motivated, and I'm being a grown up.  I know hunger passes after 15 minutes, and if it is truly hunger, it'll come back quite quickly.  Fake hunger generally doesn't come back within a few minutes.

In other words, I'm on the hungry side, but I FEEL GREAT!
* * *
My oatmeal blew up in someone else's microwave... I'm tellin' ya the stars are stacked against me today!  I just had my lean and green huge 7 oz of shrimp salad and I'm still very hungry!!

I walked the dog this morning... it can't be that big a difference in my hunger if I walk around the block...?!?!
I ate a pickle as an optional snack, and am tempted to have a shake before going to bed... Medifast says if you're really hungry then don't go off plan, have another shake... so I'm going to do that!  I bought some ground turkey and some mahi mahi so I'm going to go look at the recipes on the MF website boards and see what I can see.

My scale was down 5 lbs this morning... so THAT is a good thing!

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