Wednesday, February 1, 2012

February 1, 2012

A Dining Table can help re-establish (save? rescue?) a relationship.

Eating a meal together... home cooked & tasty real food... no tv.... no couch eating... making plans and discussing the day.

Better.

Weight Loss: eh.

Emotional State: Better

Physical State: getting over being sick (off work 2 days) - missed fabulous coaching session for chorus


* * *
30 Minutes working together on the house.
Not working together at the same time... but as a team separately. Common Goal = to have friends over and have fun movie and game nights. Clear surfaces. Which requires a place for guests to sit. Cleanliness is key here. Lack of Stuff, also important. Working inside and outside on the space we share together.

I feel like such a grownup.

finally.
* * *
Less Stuff. Downsize. Donate. I'm not as bad as the tv show, but honestly,  it wouldn't be that far for me to cross over. Why do I have such a difficult time letting go? Such a weird thing - holding on to the past... saving for 'one day' or 'it may come in handy' -- and until that time just keeping everything stuck.

Two empty coffee jars have been sitting on the counter next to the sink for a couple weeks. They're great sized, nothing printed or bumpy on the outside... would be great for a craft project - or for holding ... something (I can't even think of anything at this moment - but I *know* they'd be good for SOMETHING). Himself took our dinner plates to the counter, and we were talking about clearing and letting go, and I said it was okay to recycle those two empty jars.

It pained me to see him put them in the recycling bin. PAINED ME. Physically affected me.

What IS this? How did I get here? What thought process and pattern brought me to this weird place where letting go and getting rid of things is so incredibly difficult? What am I afraid of?
* * *

Random... lots of drama in other areas of life, nothing major... just time consuming. Every day needs to be a day to re-focus. Re-energize. Re-commit.

Peace. Gratitude. Breathe.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I don't know what it is, but I suffer from it as well. Saved a couple of empty coconut flour cans for almost a month around Xmas cause I kept thinking I would need or could "use" them...and this all while my pantry was already so full of jars and cans that stuff was almost falling out of it. Somehow I think it's connected to the emotional eating issues I have. Turning loose of anything ( even my coat of fat ) is difficult. Hopefully, I'm getting past it. I am finally realizing that tremendous freedom comes ( funny, huh ) with the cathartic gesture of throwing something away...once you can make yourself do it !

Mom said...

I am so happy to hear about you and Brian actually sitting down at a table to ea. It always made me feel better if there was someone to eat with 'cause then you tend to talk, and as long as there is no arguing or disagreements your digestion works better too. So glad you are confronting some of those demons about saving stuff. Not that I am much better but sometimes you have to just "not look" and shred it or trash it or Goodwill it. I must admit though it isn't new to you since you saved rocks at one time that weren't even pretty! I love you and admire you so much

Jim Purdy said...

"... no tv ..."

This is a little off-topic, but I gave away all my televisions and radios back in 2005, and I've never missed them once.

The free time has let me reconnect with books (Is anybody today old enough to remember books?)

I love books, especially classics by great philosophers and scientists and thinkers -- Descartes, Darwin, Thoreau, Gandhi. In comparison to those writers, today's fads like Twitter, Facebook, and other social media are just junk food for the mind.