Wednesday, July 20, 2022

My Voice

I've been thinking a lot about My Voice. My voice used to mean my singing voice. I am a Mezzo-Soprano in the classical singing world; a Lead/Baritone in the Barbershop a cappella world. 

Like so many of us, my whole world is shifting. I have quit my affiliation/membership with Sweet Adelines International, a women's Barbershop organization with which I began singing with in 1991, fresh out of college. And my quartet has broken up after 11 years. Those stories are for a different day, but suffice to say that after 30+ years of singing barbershop, and now I am not - well, it has left a huge gap in my life. 

 My Voice isn't my singing voice so much anymore.

Once I joined Sweet Adelines, the Chorus & Quartet were, for the most part, priority number 1 in my life. Singing excellent Barbershop a cappella takes a lot (A LOT) of time, thought, preparation, planning - lol, not to mention practice. I started grieving the loss of leaving my tribe of like-minded, passionate-about-this-art-form women and friends in 2021, so my feelings of loss are managed - but Who Am I without all of *THAT*?!

I say all that to say now... I've got time to focus on something I really want, but it feels so incredibly loose and wide open that I'm not taking steps toward what I really want! I feel like I'm just kinda floating along in all this 'free time' - enjoying the luxury of no deadlines, no obligations.
 
So if My Voice is not my singing voice for awhile; at least, not for now... then I need to find my Writing Voice. I want to pursue writing. 
 
So... what is my Writing Voice? Just how do I find it? What do I write about? What do I care about? What am I passionate about? What do I have to say? What can I write about that will allow me to be financially independent? Or, to put it another way; what will I write about that someone else wants to read and for which I will be compensated?

* * *

I'm going to be doing a real estate course called "100 Days to Greatness" and it starts 8/24. So I've been mulling around the whole "100 Days" theme:
  • 100 Days of Blog Writing Every Day
  • 100 Days of no spending (lol, no Amazon!)
  • 100 Days of Reading for pleasure again
  • 100 Days of commitment to Whole Food, Plant Based No Oil eating
  • 100 Days of learning to cook delicious (and new) vegan recipes
  • 100 Days of No Processed Food (another way of saying the above, sort of)
  • 100 Days of Journaling
There's so much I'm interested in... Focus is a discipline of which I have often fallen short in the past. And yet, I can lose myself in projects. I can "super-focus" and time falls away. I love when that happens!
 
* * * 

What do I want my life to look like in a year?

This was the answer given to me when I asked the question, "Where do I start?"

I would like to be able to financially support myself from anywhere. Ideally, from my truck and trailer rig that might be parked at the White River campground at Mount Ranier National Park in Washington, for instance; that I can hang out in the summer for about 3 weeks or more... writing, reading and enjoying the cool weather. 

I would like to be able to play my guitar and ukulele, cook healthy meals in my Instapot, drink delicious herbal tea and meet other travelers. Perhaps I can even perform a little at some of the RV Parks around the country.
 
I would like to make learning tracks for those who still sing Barbershop, lots of talented musicians don't read music and having a track to teach you the song and your part is helpful. It keeps my "voice in the game" and since I love learning, I'll always be learning a new song!
 
I see myself with a little four-footed furry companion or two, canine preferred since I am allergic to cats :(.

I see myself on my own, but seeing friends and family along my journey. I see myself blogging my adventures - Instagram and maybe even a YouTube channel as well.

* * *

Let's start with blogging, I think. To write every day, starting with a goal of writing every day for 100 days, building the habit and the discipline of writing even when I don't "feel like it." Of writing even when I have nothing to say. Writing about people, places and experiences that have impacted me and what I have learned or gained from these things?



1 comment:

kim and ron said...

Hey Carrie, thanks for sending me your blog link. This is a new world for me so forgive me if I am doing something wrong. I just read about you leaving the world of Barbershop and feeling like you "lost your voice". I can relate to this in a slightly different way. I literally lost my ability to sing (or speak for almost a year, above a whisper) in 2013 (Stupid cancer). I too struggled with "Who am I if I cannot sing?" I still miss singing SO MUCH since I felt so happy and joyous when I was singing, alone or with others. My favorite dream, but one that also crushes me, is when I am singing in my dream. You keep trying new things and find what make you happy. I hope you do continue to share your love of singing with others.